Most of you now know that I got married in June. It was the best day of my life and I’m truly lucky to be in love with my best friend. But lately something has been bugging me, and I need to get it off my chest.
Ever since we got married, it has been the standard question of our friends/family/strangers who just found out that we got married to ask me if I’m pregnant and/or if Kyle and I are planning on having kids soon. Don’t get me wrong- I’m excited to be a mom and experience something as wonderful as that. But Kyle and I just got married in June. Literally four months ago. And right now, we both have agreed to just enjoy being married.
I know that the people asking this aren’t trying to be rude, mean, or nosey. I mean, I understand why it’s a common question to ask after two people get married. I love Kyle with my whole heart and I’m looking forward to the day we bring a little one into the world. But right now, it’s nice to just enjoy each other’s company and what it means to be married.
When women get married, it’s not their duty to just pop out a child right away anymore. It’s okay to wait a little while and to enjoy all the little things that come with marriage. The spontaneous date nights, the weekends spent in pajamas, the freedom to take road trips to see family and friends a few hours away. These are the things that I love enjoying right now and that would become more difficult when we have kids.
And frankly, I still have some growing up to do. Being only 25, I feel like I still have a lot to learn about myself. I feel like I’m still learning new things about Kyle, and I’ve known him for almost 5 years now!
When the time comes, I know it’ll be the most wonderful blessing, and it’s a day I truly look forward to. But right now, our small family is perfect as it is.
Even though Kyle and I are choosing to wait a while before having kids, there is nothing wrong with having children right away, having children before marriage, or choosing not to have children at all. All marriages, all families, and all families with children are beautiful and perfect. No one should have to worry about what others may think or say because they’re doing things a little differently than others.
So if you just got married and are being asked about children, I want you to know that you aren’t alone. I want you to know that it’s okay to wait. I also want you to know that it’s okay to have children right away. And if you’re not married and you’re pregnant, that’s okay too. There is no standard right way to have a child, nor should there be, because everyone in this world is so vastly different and it’s okay to do things differently. Don’t be afraid to be different.
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